Sunday, January 25, 2015

How to Make a Zombie Gas Bomb

More fun with deleted scenes from GRACE AMONG THE DEAD

This deleted scene goes way the hell back, when Derek Grace was Derek Whitman and Pastor Bryce, although having the same name, was a completely different character. The mythology about the Final Flu still stands, though, especially in regards to bloated gas-bomb walkers. Derek Grace explains this to Pastor Bryce at their first meeting at Bryce’s office:

“The Final Flu bacterium overwhelms and kills the bacteria that cause normal decomposition. That’s why we still have so many of these former, living humans stumbling around instead of slime-encrusted skeletons. Of course, they’re still reeking of something, which is why you smell them. Mainly the Final Flu bacteria within them feeding on the living flesh they eat.”

“Zombie farts. Huh. My inner ten-year-old is beside himself.”

“If he likes the really gross stuff, he’s in for a treat. Of course, we know the dead do pass what they eat, eventually. Which is why it’s sort of a good thing most of their pants are rotted off the backs of them from their initial voiding at time of death. Sort of. 

“Anyway, one of them might wolf down a chunk of flesh with the bone still in it or something. Maybe they’ll bite off a piece of clothing, or a shoe, like the one that bit into my boot today.”

“Oh yes, I heard about that. How’s your new boots, by the way?”

“Great, thanks. But you see what happens, right?”

“Yes. Their alimentary tract gets blocked.”

“While the bacteria attached to the rotting meat within continues to produce gas.”

“I suppose I should count my blessings, that of all the things I’ve seen since the onset of the Final Flu, I’ve never seen that.”

“Look around any large mob of them you’ll see one that looks like he or she might be morbidly obese. Except, of course, there aren’t any rolls of fat. They’re smooth all the way around. They’re also completely naked because they’ve swollen out of their clothes. Another reason you don’t see too many of them it’s because they have to burst, eventually. More often it’s a naked walker coming at you with its guts hanging out and the skin around the tear hanging down like an oversized sheet.”

“I’ll admit I don’t get out much. Even with all the reports I get from the field it’s easy to forget how nasty these things are. I’m hearing they’re almost all naked now, the way their clothes are rotting off of them.”

“Not quite, but getting there.”

There’s more where this came from in either one of my two books in the SAGA OF THE DEAD SILENCER. Just sayin’. BLEEDING KANSAS, in particular, is free with Kindle Unlimited.